Empower Managers to Stop Harassment

Like many other professional women, I’ve experienced workplace sexual harassment. Here are two such episodes and the very different ways my then employers responded. First, while thriving at a media company, I was being harassed by a high-level colleague whom I refer to as Ulterior Motive Mentor. Under the guise of helping me with my career, he’d been coming on to me, and I learned from coworkers that he claimed we were dating. (We were not.) I sat down with a supervisor I trusted and opened up about the situation. The supervisor told me I must use the company-mandated process to make a “formal complaint.” In order to do that, I had to sit for an interview with a male HR screener whom I had never met or seen before. Several days later I had to go to a different building to sit for yet another interview, this time with a female HR director. During that interview I learned not only that another woman had reported similar concerns about my harasser just one year earlier, but also that the female HR director had been friends with the Ulterior Motive Mentor for 20 years. Several days later I was asked to trek up to the office of a male HR director to sit for yet another interview. The formal process was a dehumanizing waste of time that was meant to discourage me from ever complaining about sexual harassment again. After the female HR director apparently helped Ulterior Motive Mentor cover up his misconduct, and when I wouldn’t drop the matter, my contract wasn’t renewed. I have few positive things to say about my time with that company. Shocker. Second, earlier in my career I was employed at an elite car dealership, where a highly successful salesman (let’s call him Shameless Dude) had a habit of grinding his crotch against the backsides of young professional women at the office, as though he was dancing in a nightclub. One day a female coworker and I casually went to our supervisor’s cubicle and mentioned to her that we wanted Shameless Dude to stop grinding up against us. Our supervisor simply walked across the showroom floor to the male sales manager and in so many words said, “Can you please tell Shameless Dude to stop touching the girls?” Without missing a beat, the sales manager summoned him over the PA system and unequivocally ordered, “Stop touching the girls!” Shameless Dude replied, “Okay.” We thanked the sales manager. Everyone dispersed. The grinding stopped. Problem solved. My career continued to thrive at that company, where I made numerous contributions without issue or retaliatory interference. I think highly of that employer to this day. These experiences involved two very different but male-dominated environments in traditionally male professions at companies with anti-sexual-harassment policies and training. In both cases multiple women raised the same issue about a “superstar” male colleague who was also a harasser—and someone with whom we would have to continue working. The media outlet’s formal approach failed largely because it punished me for reporting the harasser by putting me through a drawn-out and unnecessary process with people I neither knew nor trusted—not to mention abruptly ending my future at the company when I insisted on a fair process. The informal approach at the car dealership, in contrast, was seamless, direct, and swift, making me feel comfortable and valued, in addition to ending the harassment. The former approach illustrates much of what’s wrong with the way many employers handle sexual harassment. An everyday issue between employees (unproductive or unprofessional behavior, for example) is dealt with by the team’s supervisor; but when the problem involves sexual harassment, most companies respond to it as a legal issue, quickly calling for HR intervention and then activating a highly choreographed, often biased, quasi-judicial process. These HR-led responses rarely show sufficient concern for the employee who is being harassed and rarely lead to solving the actual problem. Typically, employers are primarily concerned with limiting their legal liability. At many companies the bureaucratic response will leave the harasser in his role, continuing the behavior. Consider CBS, NBC, and Google: Each has a large HR team and a thick policy manual, yet according to media reports, Leslie Moonves, Matt Lauer, and Andy Rubin allegedly spent years sexually harassing coworkers without deterrence or impediment. Types of Responses How do people usually respond when sexually harassed? There’s no simple answer. For most it’s less a single act than a process. Here’s what researchers have identified as the typical response route: Ignore > Avoid > Self-help > Tell family/friends > Tell coworkers > Tell supervisors/HR > Contact attorney or government agency Each of those actions falls into one of three categories: nonresponses, informal responses, or formal responses. Nonresponses, which include ignoring the harasser, downplaying the behavior, or leaving the company without telling people why, are more common than one might think. In a 2015 study 32% of people who’d been severely sexually harassed at work said they had told no one about it, compared with just 3% who filed a lawsuit; 80% wound up simply leaving the company. Informal responses include behaviors that try to address the problem without filing an official complaint. They include confronting the harasser (in person or in writing), threatening to tell others, seeking bystander help, or using humor or sarcasm to defuse the situation. Formal responses are the ones we typically think of when we hear about sexual harassment. They include filing a report with the employer’s HR department, filing a complaint with the Equal Employment Opportunity Commission (or a similar state agency), calling the police (if the behavior is criminal), or hiring an attorney and pursuing a civil suit. Formal reporting is the rarest of responses, yet most firms focus solely on that. The stronger your company’s stance against sexual harassment, and the more supportive your supervisor and colleagues, the more likely it is that you would formally report sexual harassment if it occurred. That’s not surprising. A supportive supervisor wouldn’t want you to suffer in silence, and good colleagues wouldn’t want you to “take one for the team” by saying nothing. In upstanding companies, sexual harassment violates the written and unwritten rules defined by corporate culture. When the culture appears to condone harassment, it’s unlikely that people will file complaints. For instance, I once worked at a law firm where my supervisor casually told me that the firm’s chairman referred to me as “a hot piece of ass.” After hearing that, do you think I reported to HR when my supervisor started coming on to me? No. Formal reporting is the rarest of all responses chosen by both men and women, yet most companies focus solely on formal reports. Typically, however, if an employee makes a formal report, that means all other avenues have been exhausted or the harassment is severe, such as touching or sexual coercion. Two reasons that formal reporting is rare are the prevalence of retaliation and the outdated nature of most employers’ reporting processes. Many employers have recycled the same old-school approach for decades, despite advancements in research confirming what does or does not work. This research suggests that new-school approaches are often more effective at preventing harassment. The Old-School Approach The old-school approach touts a zero-tolerance sexual harassment policy. Employees must file a formal complaint, which may involve interviews with management and/or a written, signed statement outlining the allegations. After the official report is made, the employer decides whether the alleged behavior constitutes sexual harassment; if so, the investigation begins. The harasser and any witnesses are notified and interviewed, and relevant evidence is collected. The employer may reinterview the reporting employee or invite her to submit supporting evidence. After the investigation concludes, the employer decides whether the harasser violated company policy and if so, whether and how the harasser should be punished. Sometimes employers using this approach try to appear progressive by throwing in a reporting hotline. The old-school approach does have some benefits—such as allowing for greater accountability and employer- sanctioned punishment, tracking repeat offenders, and using a set structure. It also has significant drawbacks: It does not help reduce sexual harassment, because the many redundant hurdles discourage people from reporting. The person experiencing harassment may not want or need the harasser to be formally punished if the harassment is minor and she simply wants the behavior to stop. Also, the sterile formalities of this approach do not encourage employees to raise sensitive and emotionally upsetting issues. Unfortunately, despite these and other known shortcomings, many employers still offer only the old-school approach. The New-School Approach A progressive approach offers more options—generally informal, formal, anonymous, and confidential—for filing and resolving sexual harassment reports. Here are a few examples based on research by Frank Dobbin and Alexandra Kalev and the 2018 sexual harassment solutions tool kit created by the bipartisan think tank New America: In place of “zero tolerance,” a progressive policy offers responses that are appropriate for problematic behavior, from helping the parties maintain a professional working relationship to removing a predatory, serial harasser from the workplace. A confidential electronic reporting system allows an employee to request that his or her report be held until someone else makes a complaint about the same person. Employees may make a complaint to any manager with whom they are comfortable. The manager is authorized to either informally address the matter with the harasser or escalate it to designated personnel for investigation. Neutral third-party mediators are available to resolve issues between employees, with the goal of professional and peaceful interaction rather than punishment. A third-party entity or an independent board is retained to investigate complaints, recommend action and punishment, track complaints, and stay watchful for retaliation in the aftermath. Before an employee is fired for sexual harassment, the seven-part test used for labor union grievances is applied to determine whether termination would be appropriate. The test looks at, among other things, whether the employee was adequately warned and whether the allegations were investigated in a fair and objective manner. Such new-school approaches to addressing harassment prove worthwhile, particularly because they give employees options for resolving the matter. They help ensure that the process is fair and the outcome just. Dealing with Negative Reactions Even if someone experiencing sexual harassment works for an employer that offers the best of the new-school approaches, remember that a harassed employee is interacting not with policies but with people, all of whom come with their own personal experiences and biases. Some individuals react to reports of harassment with empathy and compassion; others do not. When those who have been harassed are trying to decide among non-, informal, and formal responses, I urge them to prepare for potential negative reactions from unempathetic supervisors, HR personnel, and colleagues, which are all too common. Some examples: Disbelief. Many women don’t report sexual harassment for fear of not being believed. Decent employers combat this by training report takers to show empathy and compassion. If the person taking your report lacks those skills or communicates that he or she doesn’t believe you, do not be deterred. You know the truth, and no one can take that away. You don’t need someone to believe you; you need someone who is open-minded and impartial. If your first interaction with the person suggests that’s not the case, consider requesting that someone else be assigned to take your report and investigate. If that’s not granted, insist that your report be taken nonetheless. You may also have the option of going directly to the Equal Employment Opportunity Commission or an analogous state agency to file a complaint. Dismissiveness. Although it may be less common since the #MeToo movement gained momentum, some employers summarily dismiss sexual harassment complaints. That violates any policy that promises complaints will be handled promptly and fairly. If your report is being ignored, you may want to insist on speaking with someone else, submit a detailed complaint in narrative letter format, or go to a government agency. Retaliation. Retaliation is illegal—yet it happens in at least 75% of instances where sexual harassment is reported: The reporting employees are demoted, given bad shifts, fired, sexually assaulted, or further harassed. When it comes to handling retaliation, consider alerting top management or going straight to a government agency. Whatever you do, document any retaliation, just as you would sexual harassment, and consider consulting an attorney. CONCLUSION Every person who experiences harassment on the job must decide how to respond. Given the potential negative reactions, I recommend that individuals reflect on these key questions when deciding how and whether to report sexual harassment to an employer: Does the behavior you’re experiencing violate company policy or the law? Has it happened more than once? Have you tried, or might it be possible, to resolve the situation informally? Do you have documentation or witnesses, or is this a he said/she said situation? Is anyone else experiencing the same problem? How well-liked or successful is the harasser, and how does that compare with your status at the company? Do you know how your employer has responded to past formal complaints about sexual harassment, and do you know whether the people who filed the complaints felt well treated? Do you feel that you’ll need to leave your job if the behavior doesn’t stop? If you file a formal complaint, are you willing to risk being ostracized or forced out of your job in retaliation? Retaliation and ostracism don’t always follow reports of sexual harassment. But as long as they often do, it’s vital to ask yourself those key questions, because some employers are not sincerely invested in stopping sexual harassment.

Empower Managers to Stop Harassment

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